“I am not young enough to know everything”

Facts I say! Facts!

Dudes, that is so not me. I am not asian, nor do I part my hair in such a horrid manner.

It really is quite mysterious, because I did not post this picture, and my blogging password is different from my password to everything else, so I don’t know how it got there.

I wonder if this chick could hook me up with some Starbucks. She appears to be a barrista. I’m leaving it, for the sake of comedy….. besides, I’ve always wanted to be asian. OK, not really. But it is a change.

I was going to blog about something I found funny, but you guys would probably find putrid, so nevermind.

I really want to say it though.

But I won’t.

Rebecca starts school again today, after a two week hiatus for fall break. Good thing, too. Situations with the cowboy are rather tense today, and it’ll be nice to get her away from it. The cowboy’s indian has peed in my floor (count ‘em) three times during the night or early morning. That dog really needs a catheter.

Off I go to prepare for work, or possibly war and then work. I’ve got my fightin’ boots on today. Wanna go?

I’ve just had a not-so-pleasant realization. I’m not as smart as I believed myself to be. I’m just not. This is an issue. I’ve got to study something now, because I need to know more than I do. I think I’m going to try and learn about Rome.

It isn’t that I thought myself a genious, because I didn’t. Now I’m reading some of my blogs in the past, and I realize I sometimes sound more like a 15 year old than I do my own age. But am I stressing over that because I want people to percieve me as being smart, or because I want to percieve myself as so? Then again…. I’m not trying to write intelligent insight all of the time. Sometimes I feel like writing what I’m thinking, and sometimes (or most times) I don’t think at an Ivy League level. I do, however, tend to dumb myself down to my audience. If I’m amongst stupid people, I think I’ll most likely sound stupid. When I speak to the educated, I tend to be at least a little more intelligent-sounding.

Example: My mom is a smart woman. She’s very bright, but not very “educated” in the worldly, or collegiate sense. When I talk to her, it’s about mundane things. I’ve never spoken with her about say…. the supreme court…. or…. new research studies in medicine.

I’ve just realized another reason I love Shane so much. He can discuss these things with the best of them, but he can also laugh at a fart. THAT is what makes a good partner, in friendship or in love. The ability to be really smart and really stupid at the same time. I mean good-stupid, not stupid-stupid. All of my great friends have been people who were able to engage in philosophical conversations, and also people who enjoyed a good pirate joke.

Really… it seems like there are so few of those people around.

Someone tell me something. What is the difference between to and too? I know the following

To is a preposition.

Too essentially means “also”

Fill in the blanks:  I want __ go ___ the water park, and Sally does ___. I think Sally has been there ___ much.

I will ask the english man when he gets home, and we’ll clarify this.

1. I’m grumpy all the time. I don’t know why.

2. I can’t go to Garrity’s party. It’s this Saturday. Not the next one. Pisser.

3. My blog won’t upload the “great” hair pic I want to show you.

4. Bushy eyebrows are now apparently “in” according to the shmucks at Neiman Marcus. This chick had amazingly huge ones. Remember Uncle Leo’s mad eyebrows on Seinfield? These are worse.

4. There is one jackass doctor in the whole ED, and I always manage to work with him.

5. My feet hurt.

6. It’s 4:15 am, and I’m blogging.

7.This Meir woman is a strange being. I don’t like her one bit. Not one.

8. This horrid, horrid animal that has came to live with us (Not Cecil, the dog named Poop) pees in my floor. I     H  A  T  E  this dog. HATE HIM

That’s all folks. Had to get it out.

The blog machine doesn’t care for HTML. Therefore, I bring you…. drumroll………… nothing.

I’m so friggin tired. I am done. On E. No gas left in this trunk. (wellll….)

Halloween party for all those from my job on the 27th (I think). I’m trying to figure out costume ideas. Erin… do you wanna come? I think I’m going to go as The Bride from Kill Bill. You know that yellow jumpsuit? Hell yeah. It’ll be my first interminglance (is that a word) with the work crew, outside of work. docs, nurses, techs, registration, housekeeping… all of us from the ole’ ED. Great fun. ED nurses have always been known to be the crazy drunk ones at the parties… at least that’s what I’ve always heard. We’ll see how they hold it. I hope Shane will come… I don’t even know for sure if I can go, being that I may work, have Cecil, be tired… etc. I hope so though. I need a break.

I was taken on an escapade yesterday, to the mall, which I love only about twice a year. It was nice to get out of the house with the family. Rebecca and I got new haircuts at Toni and Guy…. an overpriced mall salon. She looks adorable, and I look fabulous. We damned well should, for nearly $100. For some reason, every dollar that I spend on junk brings me a little relief from the “shit to do.”

St. Josephs has made the news for a child drowning. Some of my coworkers were on TV, comforting the family. Sad stuff.

Before I get into the serious stuff, I must tell you about my new houseguest…. Bernie. He is an occupational therapist, and I’m suprised he graduated high school. The man is odd. Bernie is an odd name. His real name is Bernard. If I were him, I would choose to be called Bernard. Bernie is just too similar to the movie about the dead Bernie.

He has a problem. He has a constant gawk on his face. A GAWK. His mouth hangs wide open. On first meeting, when he showed up… no Hello, I’m Bernie… now How are you today?…. only a question. The conversation was similar to the one below.

Bernie: Are you the nurse?

Self: I am A nurse, but I don’t know if I’m THE nurse.

Bernie: You’re a nurse?

Self: (frustrated) Yeah.

Bernie: Are you Cecil’s nurse?

Self: Sure. Whatever. 

and so on and so forth. The man is strange. He is always an hour late, his mouth is always wide open, and he wears bus-cop sunglasses. Anyone who would like a laugh (and maybe to be creeped out a little) come and see Bernie on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays at the Jump, Morris, Austin, and Austin household. 

Now in other news (and probably bigger news): We are going to get pregnant. Not tomorrow, but sometime in the next year. We’ve thought about it, and it will be. We’re financially stable, ready for the challenge, have health insurance, and Rebecca is getting older. I believe if she gets too much older, I won’t want to have another. Six years is the maximum age difference I want my children. It’s time.

Now for the problem: we aren’t married yet. I think we will be soon… but I’ve thought that for a while, and it never seems to come around. It isn’t a matter of wanting to, it’s a matter of actually going and doing it. I just don’t know what to do. Vegas? JP? I can’t plan a wedding now. We can’t go out of town for a length of time, because we have a five year old and a sixty-nine year old we need to care for. WK Concert? Preacher at the house? I hear Erin is an “in” thing these days… maybe an Erin wedding? Maybe I’ll go online and marry us…. I don’t know. This isn’t a case where we need to be married for a while before being pregnant, because we’ve already lived together for so long, and because we have previously mentioned responsibilities.

So I’m ready. He’s ready. Now we’ve just got to go and DO it. That’s the hard part. Complacency is not cool.

Though I’m not sure what it means to be tagged, I am, so I believe I will fill this out rather than go to sleep.

5 Years Ago: I had a six month old daughter, and I was taking midterms for my first semester in college. I was in a failing marriage, and living in a one bedroom apartment. I was hanging out at the Dragon, because I hadn’t found out about Central Station yet, and I was only 18.

1 Year Ago: I was living in Oklahoma City, and trying to endure the first season of being a football coaches “wife.” I was in midterms of my senior year. I was lonely, and frustrated, and scared about the future.

Yesterday:  Yesterday I was a nurse. It was amazing… it is every day. I went to see crazy Cecil in the hospital, and then I saved some lives and kicked some ass. Really I just thought about kicking ass. I didn’t do it. But I could. Don’t test me.

5 Songs I know by Heart:

1. The Dance by Garth Brooks: In seventh grade, this was the jam. I had a crush on this dude that I danced with once in Junior High after I won the spelling bee, and this was the song. I now despise it, because it’s Garth Brooks, and he’s let himself go.

2. Waterfalls by TLC: Also was the jam. However, I still have mucho fun with this song.

3. You Oughtta Know by Alanis Morrisette: The karaoke anthem for me. Who knew she was once a canadian pop star? I couldn’t believe it when I saw what she used to be.

4. Puttin’ on the Ritz by Taco: Fantastic friggin song. Enough said.

5. Carmelita by the ole’ Counting Crows: Also enough said.

5 Things that I would do with 100 Million Dollars

70 Million would go to charity. Then I would by some land and build a house exactly the way I wanted it. I would own a horse or seven, and I would start working on my list of 100 things to do. Next up, FYI, is run two miles without stopping. That probably wouldn’t finish me off. After all this, I would run for president. I bet I could win with 20 million of my own, all thrown into the race. I may invest some, but that’s boring.

5 Places that I would Run Away To:

The Brazos River

Tahiti

That hill I lived on when I was a kid

Iceland

Sheppard’s Rock in Jacksboro

5 Things I would Never Wear:

A belly chain

A gold tooth

Anything tye-dyed

Anything lime green

Underwear from Goodwill

5 Favorite TV Shows: Housewives, Real Time with Bill Maher, Days of our Lives, Sex/City, Apprentice with Martha, and Trauma: Life in the ER

5 Favorite Toys: Four Wheelers, Board Games, Pedro, Tivo, and Pop up books (aren’t those a cool invention?)

The three people that may come across this blog in the future: Let me apologize. This blog will be sickening.

I just wanted to write for a minute about what an excellent man I have. I’m not going to brag about the fact that he writes me letters or is very sweet. I’m talking about how amazing he is as a person.

When something big happens in our lives, it effects the relationships we have as well. Shane’s mother has just passed away, and now his father has come to live with us. This man is giving Shane hell. It’s understandable for him to be grumpy and complain a little, but he just isn’t treating my man like he should. I won’t go into detail with it here, because family life is family life, and not internet life. However, Shane has absolutely amazed me during this whole event.

I told him the other night… that I didn’t only love him. I admired him, respected him, trusted him, and liked him as well. I am so lucky to have found such a wonderful person. Sure, we fight, and sure, it isn’t always roses…. but I am the luckiest girl in the world for two reasons: 1. I have the best guy in the world as a partner, and 2. I realize he’s the best guy in the world.

Yay! Now out of my sappiness, and off to work.